This week, I received an unexpected gift. It was a beautiful piece of artwork of red leaves in the fall sent to me by our good friend Jon Begg.
Jon lives in the Great White North but always comes for dinner and a fish whenever he is back in southern Ontario. On his last visit, we talked photography and he showed me pictures on his phone of images he had taken of the fall foliage that he had photoshopped to look like artwork. They were simply stunning.
Fast forward to this week, and I now have one of his beautiful creations hanging in my dining room. I’m not sure if that will be its permanent place of honour but every night at the dinner table, I find myself admiring this unexpected gift.
This week’s #HappyAct is to bring some joy to someone special by sending them an unexpected gift. Leave a comment and share what you did. Here’s another one of Jon’s treasured gifts, a mock magazine cover of one of the boys’ 2008 fishing expeditions on the Moira River.
Reflections of Who I am Who I want to be Personified in Perfect symmetry
Lines blur and blend Bending to my will Distorting where reality ends And make-believe begins
I drift in and out Amongst the reeds and the trees My memories floating Dancing on the surface
Reliving the past Without absorbing What might have been What still could be
Filling an aching void Always reproachful Always critical A bright light Thrown back from the surface
If only we could change To reflect a better version of ourselves A flawless mirror Illuminating the beauty And light within our soul
Ed. note: The idea for this poem came to me after spending time looking at the beautiful reflections of the trees on the water on my lake. At first, it was going to be a photo essay, but it morphed into a poem after I visited a sculpture called “Reflections“ last weekend in a park in Pickering. The sculpture was erected in memory of those who lost their lives to COVID. Here was the description:
“Amongst the panels sits a solitary void to the open sky. The mirrors encourage us to see ourselves from different perspectives and contemplate the personal and collective experience of self-reflection and solitude. The missing mirror examines themes of loss and grief, representing those we lost to COVID-19. Every day as the sun crosses behind the sculpture, the bright spot created by the void cuts through the shadow as it swings across the ground. This light is a reminder that although our loved ones may be gone, they are not forgotten and will continue to be present in our daily lives, drifting in and out, both in influence and memory.”
A few weeks ago, I attended a “Meet a Farmer” night hosted by South Frontenac Township as part of the Open Farm Days events.
It was a lively, informal and highly illuminating discussion of the trials, tribulations and joys of small-scale farming in eastern Ontario.
I learned I have a lot to learn about the food that goes on my table.
One of the panelists was Sarah Winney from The Rise Farm in Godfrey. Sarah and her partner Rob sell farm fresh ducks, chickens, turkeys, rabbits, and eggs along with bread and kitchen pantry staples, such as seasoning salt, farm fresh garlic, and marinades.
You would think it would be a relatively simple process for small-scale farmers like Sarah and Rob to get meat butchered and prepared, but it’s not. Sarah and Rob have to take their meat to five different abbatoirs, some as far as 300 kms away. That’s because there isn’t enough abbatoirs to meet the demand, and the big ones are dominated by the large meat producers.
They could prepare their birds and rabbits themselves, but they aren’t allowed to. Regulations stipulate the meat needs to be taken to a licensed abbatoir (they can kill their own birds, but only for their own consumption, not for retail).
As a result, it’s very expensive to get their ducks, turkeys and chickens prepped—it can cost them as much as $9 a bird, which leaves very little profit margin.
The cost is even higher if they have the abbatoir label the packages with weight and other information which is a requirement if they want to sell their meat at farmer’s market (which is why it’s rare to see meat farmers in local farmers markets by the way).
Another thing I didn’t know is when you buy a pound of beef, it can actually be parts of 20 different cows in the package, as opposed to just a single cow when you buy beef directly from a farmer.
A few years ago, a local farmer looked into building a new abbatoir to serve small-scale farmers in our area. There was huge interest and he even had the support of local officials, but the costs ballooned past the $5 million mark and they just couldn’t make it work.
I walked away that night with a new, deep-founded respect for farmers and the obstacles they need to overcome to put food on the table for their own families and other families.
Before you pass around the mashed potatoes, turkey, ham and squash this weekend, be sure to thank a farmer.
I went to bed the other night dreaming of red and orange mosaics. It was as if the brilliant fall colours we’d seen on the weekend had been imprinted on my mind, like a patchwork quilt, lulling me to sleep.
I can’t remember a year where the colours have been so brilliant or the weather so spectacular, but this is the first year we also ventured further afar, seeking scenic lookouts.
Our first scenic lookout was the Eagle’s Nest in Bancroft, Ontario. Located on Highway 62 on the north end of town, this popular vantage point is known for its spectacular views of the Madawaska Highlands and for spotting eagles. In the winter, you can sometimes see adventure seekers ice climbing the rock face. Grace, Dave and I walked the easy trail to the lookout. The sun wasn’t out yet, but the view was still incredible—dappled greens, yellows and entire swaths of red and orange.
Views from the Eagle’s Nest in Bancroft
Our next lookout was Skyline Park in Haliburton. By the time we arrived, the sun had broken through the clouds, illuminating the reddish and orange hues surrounding beautiful Head Lake.
Views from Skyline Park in Haliburton
On Sunday, we hiked the Lookout Trail in Algonquin Park, just off the Highway 60 corridor. This 2 km loop meanders through old hardwood forest until it reaches the summit, with drop-dead gorgeous views west over the park. It was a perfect morning and we sat watching the colours unfurl with each ray of sunshine.
Three spectacular lookouts with three spectacular views. I think the mosaics will be forever emblazoned in my mind.
This week’s #HappyAct is to find a lookout in your region and enjoy a bird’s eye view of the magnificent fall we’re having. Here are some more great lookouts in eastern Ontario:
Rock Dunder in Morton, Ontario—see my write up and pictures in the post “Two Journeys in One”
I walked into the bathroom the other day and found two toilet paper rolls sitting on the counter with cartoonish frowny faces and the words “Recycle me” drawn on them. The one toilet paper character looked like it was giving me the finger.
I did the only logical thing, which was to take another toilet paper roll, cut it in half and make two little toilet paper roll children with the words “Mama” and “Dada” on them.
These are the types of love notes you send after 31 years of marriage.
Next weekend, Dave and I will celebrate our 31st wedding anniversary. In a funny twist of fate, we’ll be spending it up north at the same cottage we spent our honeymoon before going to Algonquin Park to see Grace.
I wish I had some brilliant insights about marriage but I don’t. After 31 years of marriage, I truly believe it’s a crap shoot whether people stay together or split up. We’ve just been lucky at crap.
The one thing I will say and they don’t tell you in marriage courses is marriage changes over time.
You start out madly in love and lust, then become each other’s best friends as you begin to build a life together. Children rock your world and your relationship takes second string as you focus on raising your kids.
You learn to live with each other’s foibles and idiosyncracies and intimately know each other’s aches and pains, regrets and dreams.
But if you’re lucky, you still wake up every morning not being able to imagine going through life without that person by your side, sharing a laugh or two, and planning your next adventure together.
Just make sure you recycle the toilet paper rolls and put the seat down before heading out.
Recently, I’ve moved to a four-day work week. Dave started working four days a week a year ago. It’s all part of our plan to eventually transition into retirement.
I’ve worked a four-day week one other time during my career. It was a short span of three months when the kids were little and we had many doctors and other medical appointments. It was a lifesaver—the perfect mix of having a rewarding, vibrant career, but having enough time to focus on my family and friends and get things done at home.
I can tell you I already feel a difference in both my mental and physical health.
I feel more well-rested, my brain feels like it has more space to breathe, and I’m taking time more slowly.
I’m no longer rushing through the weekend, trying to squeeze in a million things before Sunday night arrives and I have to steel myself up to do it all over again.
I’m making more plans to do the things I want to do, whether it’s having a coffee on a Friday with a friend (a luxury!), tackling a project, a long weekend away, or just spending time with Dave on little day trips here and there.
I’m getting more exercise and already feeling the positive benefits of not sitting at a desk 8 hours a day which has increasingly become more difficult and painful over the past several years.
Yes, I’m liking this four day a week thing.
Now if only more employers would wake up and realize the benefits of a four-day work week and make it happen. The world would be a happier place.
The photo above is a picture of me and my girlfriend Barbara on one of my first three-day weekends this summer when I went to visit her in Thornbury. Read about our day at the Thornbury Cider Company to see the Clark Drag Show
I’m fine and Dave and the girls are fine, but there are just too many people I care about that are getting kicked in the teeth by life right now. It’s making me feel overwhelmed and helpless.
So what can you do when your happiness is being crushed by a heavy heart?
Hug your loved ones and tell them you love them every day.
Have a good cry if you need to.
Be grateful for friends, family, and the people who will be there when you need them most.
Try to find solace in the smallest joys and moments.
And bake a lot of banana bread*.
My heavy heart goes out to all of you right now, you know who you are.
*The banana bread reference is a funny story worth sharing to end this week’s blog with a smile, even if it is a sad smile. When my sister-in-law MaryAnne was sick, I brought food over every week for her and Mac. Their wonderful neighbours in Westport also dropped off meals and baked goods regularly. One day when I showed up with soup and some cookies, Mac said “As long as it isn’t another f**kin banana bread!”
We were greeted in the farm store by a young girl, who handed us a self-guided map and invited us to take a tour of this working farm.
Our tour guide was an Australian shepherd who led the way from paddock to pen to the various barns and milking stations.
The farm has a massive herd of 800 water buffalo and the paddocks are organized by age, with the adults, tweens and babies separated in the calf barn.
I was very taken by these interesting creatures. The babies in the calf barn were either very curious and friendly, eager for a pet or very shy, backing away from the stall when you went to touch them.
The adults were HUGE with massive teats, broad girths and some with devil horns that twisted around their head.
The farm operation was very modernized, with robotics in the milking barn that steered the cows into their stalls and automatic milkers that disconnected immediately as soon as the cows gave their 8-10 litres per day of milk.
We learned 15% of the world’s milk comes from water buffalo and an adult water buffalo can reach weights up to 2600 pounds.
After our tour, we shopped in the farm’s Buff Stuff Store which carries every type of buffalo meat you can imagine from testicles (limit one per customer!), to liver, to beef patties and steaks and cheeses made from the buffalo milk, their most popular being their mozzarella di bufala, as well as jewelry and steins made out of buffalo horns.
After buying some buffalo burgers for the barbecue, we chatted with owners Martin Littkemanna and Lori Smith, whose young daughter was selling lemonade and homemade cookies to raise money for a friend whose mother was fighting cancer.
Dave asked about the different species of water buffalo, since when we were in Tanzania we had been warned that they could be aggressive. Martin explained there are two main types of water buffalo, river buffalo and swamp buffalo and the ones found on their farm are domesticated with a much more docile personality than the ones we saw in Africa.
Fall is a great time to tour a farm and many local communities host farm events. If you live in eastern Ontario, Open Farm Days in Frontenac County run from September 1 to October 15 and offer a huge array of back-to-the-farm experiences, some free for the whole family. For more information, see openfarms.ca.
I’ve been obsessed lately with the cost of living. I just got back from a girls’ weekend and I’m sure my friends were heartily sick of hearing me go on about prices and how expensive things are.
So I’ve decided to stop talking about money, and take action instead. Here are eight tips for saving money:
Cash in rewards points.
Look for special promotions and deals. For instance, in honour of National Movie Day, Cineplex, Landmark Cinemas and some independent movie theatres are offering $4 movie tickets this Sunday, August 27.
Use up gift certificates sitting in your wallet.
Review your streaming packages and tech and see if you can streamline your services. We haven’t made the leap yet to get rid of our landline and satellite TV, but with services now like Stack TV, now may be the time.
Forage for food. This may sound drastic, but a few years ago, I made a pledge to start eating more off the land. In July I pick raspberries, in August, I make garlic scape pesto with my garlic scapes, and in the fall I pick apples from the local fields and make crisps and apple sauce. It’s not as crazy as it sounds.
Look for “free” days and times at museums and exhibits. For instance, in Ottawa, the National Gallery of Canada, The Canadian War Museum, The Canadian Museum of History, The Canadian Museum of Nature and The Bytown Museum are all free on Thursday evenings from 5pm – 8pm
Reduce food waste. Buy less perishable food, and get creative with leftovers. Stir fries, soups, quesadillas, burritos and bowls are all great ways to use up leftover meats and vegetables.
If you need to buy something, consider used, which is also environmentally friendly. Fall is a great time for garage sales, or shop on Facebook marketplace. Luckily vintage clothing shops have come back into fashion.
Happy Act 