Hang out with happy people

Song album cover for Save yourself

Two weeks ago, I shared a post called Seven Habits of Highly Unhappy People.

As much as it’s important to avoid unhappy habits, it’s just as important to avoid hanging out with people who are pessimistic, focus too much on themselves and see themselves as victims in this world.

As Ed Sheeran in his beautiful song Save Yourself says, “human beings are destined to radiate or drain.”

This week’s #HappyAct is to surround yourself with people who are positive, bring out the best in you and who radiate. Avoid those who drain.

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Live a right life

Saying live a right life

This week’s #HappyAct is courtesy of a colleague who posted this saying on his Instagram account, “Do everything with a good heart and expect nothing in return and you will never be disappointed.”

He said he has made many mistakes in his life (haven’t we all), learned many lessons and changed behaviours. His mantra from now on was going to be “live a right life”.

His words really spoke to me. I’m not sure how many people do things nowadays with a pure heart, expecting nothing in return.

Live a right life is going to be my mantra from now on too. Thanks for the inspiration, Paul.

Seven habits of highly unhappy people

happy thoughts

In his book, Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey shared how having deliberate and mindful habits can help you be successful in business.

So to with happiness.  Psychologists who study happiness say that genetics and life circumstances only account for about 50% of a person’s happiness. The other 50% is driven from attitudes and habits.

Sometimes it’s easier to recognize what makes you unhappy than happy. Here are seven habits to avoid or to watch for to help you be more happy:

  1. Being pessimistic. Nobody likes a pessimist. What’s worse, pessimism can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you think the glass is half full, it will be.
  2. Focusing too much on yourself and not on others. If you think you are the only one with problems in the world, think again. Thinking and doing things for others will help you take your mind off your own problems and make you feel good about yourself.
  3. Seeing yourself as a victim. This kind of goes hand in hand with #1. You are in control of your own destiny. Don’t blame others if things go wrong.
  4. Not having goals. If you don’t have goals, you’re at risk of stagnating. Even if it’s just to learn a new recipe or getting more exercise, having a goal will give you purpose and make you feel good when you achieve it
  5. Focusing only on the future and forgetting about today. The happiest people find joy in life’s little moments and the gifts of each day.
  6. Overreacting or stressing out over little things. This is a tough one if you are prone to stress or anxiety, but if you can find ways to roll with life’s challenges, you will be more balanced and happy.
  7. Retreating into yourself. It’s great to spend time alone, but studies show interacting with people and having positive relationships are critical to happiness.

As Benjamin Franklin once said, “The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.”

This week’s #HappyAct is to avoid these seven unhappy habits. Have a happy week.

Have a Happy Do Over Day

I watched a movie about time travel last week called About Time, a charming British indie film that was warm, thought-provoking, and witty.

In the movie, the father and son have a special gift: the ability to travel to places and times they have been before.

There is a critical scene in the movie, where the father tells the son the secret to happiness is to live each day twice: the first time normally with all the tensions and worries of every day life, and the second time doing the exact same things but noticing how sweet life is.

The film shows an ordinary day for the son. His morning is stressful, juggling making breakfast and lunches for his children, then fighting the morning commute downtown to his job as a lawyer, and endless meetings that seem pointless and bring little joy into his life.

The next scene is the son living the same day over. This time, he sees how beautiful his children are, and cherishes the precious moments with them over the breakfast table. On his morning commute, he looks out the window at the sunshine and marvels at the gift of another day. He sees the humour in the office shenanigans and celebrates success in court.

This week’s #HappyAct is to pretend we are time travellers. Choose an ordinary day this week, and relive it doing the exact same things you do every day, but this time, noticing how sweet life is. I’m going to try it and see what happens. Leave a comment and share your experience.

Seven things you can do to be a child genius

One of the cool things about social media is you get a glimpse into people’s lives that you would normally never have the chance to meet.

I follow Ron Howard @RealRonHoward on Twitter. Ron recently replaced Phil Lord and Chris Miller as director of the new Hans Solo movie in production and has been posting behind the scenes photos and stories from the set. His posts are always interesting.

Anyone who has worked with Ron says the same thing about him—his childlike enthusiasm and passion for making movies is infectious. It’s almost like little Ritchie Cunningham never grew up.

To be able to retain youthful enthusiasm is a gift. To be able to share that gift with others to inspire and motivate is pure genious.

As we age, our childlike wonder wanes. We become more stuck in our ways, closed off and disillusioned by life’s challenges.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Here are seven things you can do to keep your childlike wonder alive:

  1. Marvel at a miracle: a snowflake, a firefly, a butterfly. Every day we are surrounded by beautiful things and creatures. Take a moment to marvel at them.
  2. Live in the present
  3. Open up to others. Start conversations. People are amazing. Learn from them.
  4. Do things you are passionate about. If you love flowers, take a course in floral arrangements. If you love to bake, develop a new recipe from scratch.
  5. Ask questions.
  6. Spend time with a child. See the world through their eyes.
  7. Take time to play

Aldous Huxley once said, “The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age which means never losing your enthusiasm.”

This week’s #HappyAct is to be a child genious. Have a wonderful week.

Always see with your heart

Facebook this morning is full of images and RIP messages for a very special golden retriever: Smiley.

Smiley was born without eyes, and a rare condition that made him look like he smiled all the time. He worked as a therapy dog bringing joy and happiness to everyone he met. His owners had to put him down yesterday.

His owners posted this yesterday, “The little dog with a big heart and a grand purpose left us today at 12:30pm. In Smiley’s honour, please be kind to one another, give back, and always see with your heart.”

This week’s #HappyAct is to always see with your heart and keep smiling. RIP Smiley.

Know where you belong

sign that says happiness is knowing where you belongI’ve spent the last four days in Toronto. It struck me more than ever, that even though I was born there, I don’t belong there.

Toronto is an amazing city, but like with any large city, there is the good, the bad and the ugly.

Toronto the good

Stunning skyscrapers, lakefront paths and parks, festivals and events, fine dining and shopping, and people of every faith, race, culture living for the most part in respectful harmony.

Toronto the bad

Relentless traffic, air pollution, soaring housing prices, long commutes and endangered greenspace from concrete sprawl.

Toronto the ugly

Poverty, homelessness, and indifference. Both days, walking the few blocks to my course in the financial district, I walked past at least a dozen people sleeping on the street. One man was lying in the middle of the sidewalk sideways and was so still, he could have been dead. Everyone, EVERYONE including me stepped around him and walked by. I’m still ashamed.

This week’s #HappyAct is know where you belong. United Ways across the country are kicking off their campaigns. Get involved, give and help change lives locally where you belong.