Have you ever gone for a walk or a drive, and arrived not remembering anything you’ve seen along the way because you were so lost in your thoughts?
It happens to me more than I would like to admit.
I’m conscious of it now, so when it happens, I stop in mid-stride if I’m walking, scold my brain, and start looking at the world around me. I make a conscious effort to be in the moment, listen to the wind in the trees, the birds, see the snow glistening on the pines and just take it all in.
It’s easy to become prisoners of our thoughts. It’s hard work to see past them.
Very early on in the pandemic, an older caretaker of a church told Dave, “It will be a 1,000 days, every pandemic takes a 1,000 days.”
The Spanish flu lasted from February 1918 to April 1920. The World Health Organization declared the COVID-19 pandemic on March 11, 2020. By my count, we are at 675 days which means we have about 10 months left of living with COVID.
For the first time in almost two years, I am quietly optimistic we are beginning to see the light at the end of the COVID tunnel.
Early on, the other catchphrase was herd immunity. The pandemic will subside when a large proportion of the population has either contracted the disease or developed enough antibodies through vaccines to protect themselves from contracting the disease. With the highly contagious Omicron variant, we are now seeing herd immunity in action.
This week’s #HappyAct is to allow yourself to hope. Stay strong during these last few critical weeks and months and let’s all continue doing what we need to do to support our beleaguered healthcare workers who have been the real heroes on the front lines.
I choose to hope the end is near, and I for one, can’t wait to see what’s on the other side.
Ed. Note: This post is not based on any scientific evidence. Please take it as it’s intended, hopeful musings that brighter days lay ahead.
You may have heard about the 75 Hard challenge that’s taken over TikTok and the internet. Created by fitness guru Andy Frisella, it’s a challenge that is supposed to toughen you up mentally and physically. He calls it “ironman for your brain”. The challenge involves doing five things for 75 days straight:
Drink 3-4 litres of water a day
Follow a diet with no cheat meals or alcohol
Workout twice a day for 45 minutes, and one of the workouts must be done outdoors
Read 10 pages of a non-fiction or self-help book each day
Take a progress picture each day
We were talking about the challenge in the car yesterday, and I said, “that’s way too hard and life’s challenging enough right now, I’d rather do a 75-day easy challenge”. Here’s what our 75 Easy challenge would look like:
Laurie’s 75 Easy challenge
Drink two glasses of wine two days a week, one white, one red
Complete one puzzle
Read the newspapers and actually get moving before 10 a.m. on the weekends (shoot, I guess I’ll have to start the challenge tomorrow)
Walk from my home office to the kitchen fridge and back at least twice a day
Wear something other than slippers and leggings at least once a week
Dave’s 75 Easy challenge
Ice fish twice a week
Pet Bentley 10 times a day, including once on the belly
Read 30 pages of either John Sandford, Wilbur Smith or Ken Follett a night
Drink one bottle of Baileys or Cabot Trail maple cream, with or without coffee
Bring his minnows in every night so they don’t freeze on the front porch (to help with #1)
Clare’s 75 Easy challenge
Eat two Mr. Noodles a day, one small bowl and one large bowl
Limit her screen time on her phone to less than four hours per day
Wear an actual winter coat each time she leaves the house
Watch at least one hour of Netflix or DisneyPlus a night
Clean up after herself in the kitchen at least once a week (again, see #1)
Grace’s 75 Easy challenge
Keep her voice down to under 100 decibels when talking on the phone late at night
Journal every day
Write and re-write her study schedule daily
Pick two items of clothing up off of her floor each day
Learn one new song on the guitar each week
Bentley’s 75 Easy challenge
Chase the squirrels from the bird feeders twice a day
Sleep on one couch at least once every night
Eat two dog treats a day without trying to slobber
Actually come when my humans call, “Come, Bentley”
Bark for only 10 minutes a night on the front porch at absolutely nothing
There you have it. Hey, at least we’ll feel good when we’re all successful at the end of the 75 days. This week’s #HappyAct is to make up your own 75 Hard or Easy Challenge. What will it be? Leave a comment.
You hear these words everywhere you go this time of year, in holiday cards, in songs, in greetings and on signs.
I noticed a slight variation this week on my favourite church sign. It said, “Wishing you peace, joy, happiness and strength”.
Strength. It was an interesting choice of words. Yes, more than anything right now, we need strength and resilience.
This week’s #HappyAct is to find meaning behind the words this holiday season.
May you experience,
Kindness and generosity of spirit Love and laughter The comfort of warm food and fond memories Precious time to reflect and recharge Moments of happiness and joy And strength and acceptance to bring you peace this holiday season
From my family to yours, Merry Christmas.
Don’t miss next week’s special year-end edition of Top 10 Happy Acts, my favourite blog posts to help you get through another COVID winter.
And to the stranger who showed generosity of spirit and bought our hot chocolates at the McDonald’s drive-through in Kingston last Wednesday, thank you for paying it forward! We reciprocated and hope the person behind us enjoyed their McHappy Meal and chocolate shake.
Last weekend, Clare had a hockey tournament in Barrie. It was supposed to be a fun-filled family weekend of shopping, eating out, spending time with her team and celebrating Grace’s birthday since my baby turned 19 last week.
It was probably one of our worst family weekends ever.
Clare woke up the Friday morning with a stuffy nose, claiming it was allergies. After 5-6 hours of driving, it had developed into a full-fledged head cold. She was miserable. Grace was upset because her big birthday weekend was ruined and we spent the next 24 hours in the car or hotel room yelling at each other or sulking before turning around and driving home the next day.
There was one shining moment during that wash of a weekend. After buying drive-through Wendy’s for Clare to eat in the hotel room by herself, Dave and I did take Grace out for a nice birthday dinner at Milestones. We bought her first drink: a bellini.
If you saw any of my posts on Facebook last weekend, you’d never know our weekend was such a bust. You’d see a funny video of the kids acting silly during the car ride, a picture of Grace smiling at the restaurant with her bellini, and the pathetic Santa display in the lobby of our crappy hotel that made us laugh.
That’s the beauty of Facebook, social media and our memories. Ten years from now, we may look back on those posts and only remember those happy moments, not the tears, fighting and miserable parts of the weekend.
Not a bad thing, really.
This week’s #HappyAct is to believe in the illusion. Tis the season of believing, after all, and who knows, someday, at least in our minds and memories, it may become the truth.
When it comes to work, I’m an Eeyore, and I’m OK with that.
When someone proposes a new idea, I immediately begin to think of all the problems or things that would prevent it from succeeding. It’s not that I don’t support the idea, most times I do, but my brain kicks into logistical overload and I think through all the obstacles and challenges that would need to be overcome to make it happen.
It’s a blessing and curse…especially when you’re known as the happy act blogger.
But I’ve come to embrace my Eeyore and I believe it has helped me in my communications work.
It allows me to anticipate problems, think things through, and make better decisions.
It has helped me to develop emotional intelligence and a risk lens, so when the time comes to execute, we’ve done a good job planning and preparing for most contingencies.
It has also helped me to accept the things I cannot change, courage to try to change the things I can, even if I haven’t mastered the wisdom to know the difference.
Dan Rockwell in his Leadership Freak blog says you can be negative and still succeed. Overly optimistic leaders minimize challenges, fail to anticipate problems and are more likely to throw in the towel when success doesn’t happen quickly.
Being optimistic is great, but blind optimism is dangerous.
This week’s #HappyAct is to embrace your Eeyore but never lose the faith.
The debate on the future of work rages on (you can read about my vision for it here). This fall, many companies announced they would start bringing people back in the office. With a fourth wave of the pandemic underway, many of those same companies have deferred their plans indefinitely, making remote work here to stay.
For those of us toiling away in our bedrooms and basements, we’ve had plenty of time to contemplate what’s missing in remote work.
The prevailing wisdom is what’s missing from remote work is the four C’s: collIaboration, connection, communication and culture. While all of these things have suffered a decline to varying degress, they are not missing from remote work. We’ve still managed to collaborate, communicate and stay connected with work colleagues.
No, the key ingredient missing in remote work is energy.
There is an undeniable energy in being around and working with people. When you meet or bump into people at the office or work together in person, you feel the energy level in the room rise. Ideas are born, connections are made. Energy fuels creativity, learning, innovation and propels action. We are driven to take action and succeed, which drives a sense of purpose and accomplishment.
It has been said for introverts, this pandemic has been a blessing. It has allowed them to work quietly on their own, focus on their passions and be happy. But for extroverts who rely on the energy of others to give them strength, and help them be the best version of themselves, the pandemic has been crippling.
The problem is introverts and extroverts alike need to be re-energized from time to time, and most remote workers are running on dangerously low batteries.
This week’s #HappyAct is to assess your energy level and needs. How are you doing? Share an idea on how to fill the void so we can all recharge.
Whenever I make a mistake or am having a rough day, there are some simple phrases I repeat to myself to help keep me going.
One day at a time. This is especially helpful if you’re feeling overwhelmed or stressed. Just focus on one day at a time, and chances are things will get better.
This too shall pass. Some people say “Time heals all wounds”. I don’t think that’s the case, but time does have the ability to dull painful memories.
Everything happens for a reason. If you believe this, it is far easier to accept things when they don’t go your way.
Forgive yourself. This is a new one I’ve adopted during COVID
I hope these sayings help you too. Have a happy week.
Last week, I listened to an interesting webinar about our emotional connection to work, facilitated by Dr. Laura Hamill from Limeade.
For many of us, our relationship with work has been put to the test this past year. Some workers have grown closer to their employer, building a stronger relationship based on trust, some have struggled with feelings of separation, while others are considering breaking up with their employer.
While intuitively, we’ve always known we have an emotional connection to work, the pandemic has been a coming of age for our relationship with work. It has caused many people to reflect on what they want from their job, where they want to work, and how work contributes to their overall wellbeing.
Dr. Hamill talked about the factors that affect our wellbeing. There are some factors we have little control over: our genetics, underlying health conditions, personality, and socioeconomic status. The factors we have more control over include our mindset, habits and behaviours, social supports and relationships, and the organizational supports companies put in place for their employees.
While many companies stepped up during COVID to provide supports for employees coping with the stressors of the pandemic, Dr. Hamill maintains tools and programs are not enough. In order for us to be happy at work and have a positive sense of wellbeing, we need to feel like we belong, valued, productive and contribute to the organization’s success.
For this reason, culture, employee engagement, diversity and inclusion and employee wellbeing are inextricably linked.
As we reimagine the future of work, it will be imperative to put employee wellbeing at the forefront. If we don’t, we could be in for a nasty break up.
My horoscope yesterday said, “Do what makes you happy”. The problem is, I’m not sure what that is anymore.
Call it the pandemic blues, call it middle age (okay, I’m being kind to myself here), but I’ve found myself pondering this question the past 24 hours.
What used to make me happy was simple. My family, my beautiful lake and property, visiting with friends and neighbours, little things like the refrains of the piano drifting through the air while I sit on the back deck with a glass of wine.
These things still make me happy, but I’ll admit, it’s more subdued now.
I wish I was one of these people who found a new passion and purpose during COVID. I haven’t. I’ve fallen into the cohort known as “languishers” the term coined by the New York Times to describe those of us feeling joyless and aimless, and “slipping slowly into solitude.”
With things opening up, you’d think I’d be chomping at the bit to reach out and connect with people, but I’m not. I was talking to a friend at work the other day who felt the same way. It’s not that we have social anxiety, it’s not that we don’t miss people and would love to see them again, we just don’t have the energy.
They say one antidote to languishing is to immerse yourself in a project. But that takes energy too.
So dear readers, this week my #HappyAct is to ask you for advice. How do you figure out what makes you happy again? Please, leave a comment.
Happy Act 