I’ve been reading a lot about emotional intelligence lately. Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, understand and manage emotions. Studies show that people with high emotional intelligence have better mental health overall, higher job performance and satisfaction, and are strong leaders.
While I haven’t read enough about emotional intelligence to know for sure, it seems safe to reason that people who are emotionally intelligent are also happier. If you can recognize, understand and manage your own emotions and the emotions of those around you, you are far more likely to be able to connect with people and be happy with who you are.
The article, 13 Habits of Exceptionally Likeable People, lists thirteen habits of people who are emotionally intelligent that make them likeable. You can read the full article—it’s quite interesting, but for the purpose of what makes you happy, I will focus on these seven:
- Be curious and ask questions—it shows you care, but it also pays off in dividends in terms of learning new things, understanding, and acceptance
- Be genuine: it will make you feel confident and instill trust in others
- Be open-minded and don’t pass judgment
- Be consistent—people want to know what to expect from you
- Balance passion with fun—be serious when serious is called for, but don’t be afraid to have fun
- Use positive body language and words. Remember “how you say something can be more important than what you say” or in the words of mother Maya, people won’t remember what you say or do, but they will remember how you make them feel
- Smile and greet people by name
Here’s the good news: we all have the capability to build our emotional intelligence. This week’s #HappyAct is to raise your emotional IQ. How well did you listen to others? Did you smile and greet people by name? Were you consistent and open-minded? Have a great week everyone.
5 thoughts on “Develop your emotional intelligence”
These are all good things to keep in mind every day. They may seem like small gestures but they make a huge difference to those who look up to us ( ie, students at school).
A few years back I read a parenting book that took a look at the brain development of babies and children. One of the most interesting parts was about how you can help your children develop emotional intelligence. Surprisingly, it was very simple, but, many parents did not do it – you label emotions. When your baby/toddler/child is frustrated you tell them, ‘you are frustrated b/c the puzzle won’t work’…you label happy, sad, mad, etc. The research shows that the kids will learn and recognize their emotions faster and then be able to control them better. Leading to a higher emotional intelligence. Which is a big factor in leading a happy life.
The book was Brain Rules For Babies – here is my review: http://bookwormsfeastofbooks.blogspot.ca/2013/03/brain-rules-for-babies.html
Very interesting, Matt–I wish I knew that when my kids were younger, great advice for any new parent and I think especially in today’s day and age when kids communicate through devices which makes it even harder to detect emotion.
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